The Final Moments

It's that time.  The time that we have been both looking forward to and dreading.  It is time to go home.  Our bags are packed and waiting in the corner, and tomorrow morning, we will take one more taxi, one more ride on the MTR, and we'll check in for one more flight (okay, so we'll have to transfer and check-in in Beijing as well, but you get the picture).

Everyone we know (including ourselves) says that traveling changes your life.  Darren says (from his experience in Europe) that there comes a moment right before you get home, where you reflect on everything you've done and contemplate all that you've learned and how you've changed.  He also says that I haven't had this moment yet because I've been too busy prematurely thinking about wedding stuff (which is true of course).  However, as these last days have approached I've thought about a lot of things.  I've thought about the wedding of course, about my favourite experiences, about surviving Darren for six months, and a whole slew of other things.

For example:
I've learned that you can pretty much fit anything on a motorcycle.  You've got household furniture that needs to be transported?  No problem, strap it to a bike.  What about a few oil drums?  Done!  You've got a couple full grown, live pigs that need to get across the city?  Easy!  Maybe you're thinking the motorcycle isn't a practical family vehicle.  Well, you'd be wrong.  You can easily fit mom, dad, auntie, and two or three kids onto a bike, no problem.  Whatever you can think of, we've probably seen it being transported through dense traffic in the middle of a busy city, on a motorbike.  Those things are amazing.

I've learned that you can use the squat for anything.  Number one and number two, well those are obvious.  But what if you need to stop and have a long cell phone conversation?  Just pop a squat.  What about enjoying a midday meal in the rice fields?  Squat.  What about enjoying an afternoon meal while completely nude?  SQUAT!  You never need to worry about chairs ever again.

Through our many food adventures, I've learned, as I've mentioned before, that you can get Indian food just about anywhere.  I've also learned that I don't look good with love handles.

I've learned that being half Asian is just about the most beneficial thing when traveling in this country.  People were constantly confusing us for one of their own.  Everywhere we went it was "are you Vietnemese/Thai/Laos/Chinese?"  They weren't always sure, but the suspicion was always prevalent.  They never know what language to address you in, unless you walked in speaking English, and even then sometimes they'd offer to help you in their native tongue.  It's come in handy, especially when we have been able to speak a few words in the local language.  Initial asking prices always seemed to be lower for us, or if they weren't, they seemed more inclined to give us a better discount.  People on the street have generally been more polite and willing to help us with directions or whatever it is we've needed.  I've always felt that when I'm home (in Canada) I'm Filippino and when I'm abroad I'm Canadian.  That's still true, but here I get to be both.  There's something to be said about always feeling welcome and embraced wherever you are.  Sometimes, I suppose locals feel adverse to the invasion of their lives and culture by westerners, especially when some westerners can be very ignorant of local customs and etiquette; but, Darren and I almost always experienced nothing but a warm welcome.

I've also learned, despite the many beauties and pleasantries of all the countries we've visited, that BC is still my home.  There are some things I'm going to miss about Asia and traveling, like the incredibly low cost of living, the amazing food, the amazing people, the diversity of life, the carefree living of a traveler, and perpetual tan; but, there are things I wont miss, like the smell of fermented tofu, the spitting and loud talking, having to constantly take a bus or a plane, the complete lack of spacial awareness ("spasian awareness"), wearing clothes that are always wrinkled, and never really having a place to call your own.  Some people travel, and they say they never want to go home which I can certainly appreciate, but for me BC is where I belong.

Asia has also helped us appreciate something I think we can never appreciate enough.  The sense of community and the importance of the family in Asian culture is far beyond the ideas of the family unit in any other society I've experienced.  You don't just hang out with the kid next door around here, you hang out with the entire village.  Children run up and down the streets at all hours playing and looking out for one another.  The woman down the street is as much a parental figure to a little girl as her own mother.  We've met people who are reluctant to embrace the potential for a better life with more opportunities because they're not willing to leave their family.  The importance placed on family here really made us miss our own.  Darren and I have each other, we are each other's family, and I think that makes traveling for long periods of time easier.  Being together, we never feel lonely.  We are also fortunate enough to have family and close friends scattered across the globe.  Whether it's Hong Kong or Singapore, there are little bits of family abroad to make us feel comfortable and loved.  However, we also miss the rest of our family.  Eating with just the two of us isn't the same.  We've been fortunate enough to live in a time when technology allows us to share our experience with the people we love from so far away, but there were times when it just wasn't enough.  Times when you'd say, "This-person would love this!" or "I wish This-person could see this".  At the end of the day however, what the Asian family has really taught us, is that no matter how little money or material possessions you have, no matter how hard life can be, a family to share it with makes it all bearable.  The richest smiles I've seen were always on the poorest people surrounded by the ones they loved.

We've changed, Darren and I.  I know that the people who step onto that plane tomorrow are not the same people who made that same trip 6 months ago.  We're bigger people now, literally (our clothes are fitting a little snug and I have real love handles for the first time in my life) but, most of the changes are for the better.  We've learned a little more about each other, about ourselves and have grown together, and our views of certain things in this world have changed.  I sort of had this naive and egotistical notion when I left that after six months I'd just pick up from where I left off.  The first thing that really made me realize that life was still going on back home, despite my absence, was the realization that it would be winter when we returned, as if spring and summer were just going to wait for me to come home.  But the world back home has kept going while we've been away, and our lives and our world are going to continue to change once we get home.  Our family has changed and the true realization of that fact wont really hit us until we're there to experience it.  We're going to have to find a new place to call home and are taking on a room-mate.  I'm going back to school in January.  We're going to "start" planning a wedding, our wedding.  I guess my point comes back to what I first started talking about, that "moment".

I suppose I feel like I haven't had that single moment of reflection yet, because it's not just one particular moment.  It may sound cheesy but yes, I feel like life is an adventure.  This particular trip is ending but it's not really over.  I feel like I'm constantly thinking about what we've done, but also what we're going to do.  There are still stories to share and relive, new modes of thought to implement to our lifestyle, and people we've met to keep in touch with.  But the first thing I'm going to do when I get home, is take a breathe of fresh hair, and feel the warm loving embrace of family.